42 Degrees - Business from a different angle

These are hard times for anyone trying to exercise power. In the past, there were very clear pecking orders in business and society at large that put everyone in their place and made the exercise of authority far simpler than it is today.

Now any power you may have comes not from the structure of your organisation. It comes from you and your personal bearing. We call it 'personal impact'. It is something very few people are born with. Even the most commanding individuals have to work at it. And, once you've got it, you can lose it if you aren't focused. But the good news is that with enough thought and practice almost anyone can acquire it.

It comes from confidence in yourself and belief in your ideas, but fortunately it doesn't need years of therapy to acquire. It's about mastering a series of simple behaviours that not only affect how others react to what you say, but also affect how you feel about what you say, making you more confident both on the surface and inside.

The key is control – self control. So you have to appear to be in charge of what you are doing. You have to master the pace at which you speak and breathe, your body language and your hand gestures. Even your eye movements affect how people react to you.

You may feel terrified in a situation, but if your eyes are darting about all over the place like those of a cornered rat you communicate that fear and undermine your message. To hold the attention of a group of people, you need slow, purposeful glances at different individuals in the group. It keeps them alert and helps build rapport.

You can choose them at random, but the glances should encompass the entire group. What you need is strong, deliberate eye movements of about three to five seconds. Any longer and you can come across as a threatening psychopath. Much less and you look shifty. Your sense of time can desert you under pressure so, if needs be, count 'one thousand, two thousand, three thousand' to get your timing right.

Slow, purposeful glances affect the rhythm of your speech and even affect how you hold your head. That in turn is an important way of communicating status, which makes what you say more credible. So hold your head high and don't slouch. If you are sitting down, push the small of your back against the back of the chair – it will force you to sit straight.

Another crucial aspect is the speed of delivery. Obviously gabbling makes you appear out of control. But people often forget the importance of pauses. They not only show that you aren't afraid of silence, they allow your audience to absorb what you have just said and give it an air of significance.

As a rule of thumb, pause for one second where you would put a comma, two seconds for a full stop and three seconds for emphasis. But you do have to guard against speaking too slowly. That just makes you seem boring and self obsessed.

Body language is obviously another crucial area. Hands, for instance, can reveal a surprising amount about your inner state. Most people rarely give them a thought, but any audience will intuitively respond to weak or fidgety hands. These should be strong and expressive. You can help control the tension by stretching them (in private) before you speak. It helps get the blood flowing and invigorates them.

Gestures need to be rhythmic and suited to the size of audience. Small gestures in a large hall look weak. Large gestures in a small hall can make you look insincere or plain mad.

But often it is the smallest body movements that are hardest to control. They are the little involuntary giveaways that reveal your true state – that's why we give them the slightly distasteful term of 'leakages'.

The classic is touching your face or nose. Whenever you are tense, blood goes to your face, which can make it itchy. But scratching your nose, face or throat is invariably seen as either a sign of inner tension (which it is), thus reducing your status and the impact of your message, or else as an indication that you are lying.

But the face is another area you have to control. Under pressure it is quite normal for the face to go 'poker' – dead and inexpressive. Worse, fear can make you lock-jawed, with pin-pricked eyes and unable to make all-important eye contact with others. That look immediately shows to one and all that you are afraid.

You can help alleviate that feeling with some deep breathing (again in private) before you speak. Failing that, keep your mouth slightly open. Not in a drooly, simpleton sort of way, but just enough to take the tension off your jaw line.

Finally, you need to be aware of the use of space. Try to use as much as possible of the space available to you. It creates a physically commanding presence. A bit of movement not only keeps people alert, it can also help to relax you and your audience.

There's a lot to master here – and we haven't even mentioned your subject matter, which you must be thoroughly confident of. But, given a little practice, you do start to do these things naturally. And, the extraordinary thing is that once you start to do it, you start to feel it. The effect can be amazing.

TOP TEN TALKING POINTS

1. Self control is key. Master the pace at which you speak and breathe, your body language and your hand gestures.
2. Eyes are the mirror of the soul. So make deliberate eye movements and focus on individuals in the audience for a couple of seconds.
3. Good posture is vital. Keep your back straight and your head high, and still.
4. Try not to gabble. Use pauses as punctuation. Vary the length of your pauses depending on the impact you want to make.
5. Hands should be kept strong and should not fidget. Stretch them before speaking to keep them relaxed.
6. Keep gestures rhythmic and suited to the scale of audience and venue.
7. Be aware of 'leakage' – involuntary body movements and gestures that reveal your true inner feelings (of fear).
8. Control a fear-filled 'poker face' by leaving your mouth slightly open to conceal the tension in the jaw.
9. Try to physically use most of the space available to you.
10. Even great presence cannot compensate for lack of content in what you are saying. So, when speaking, always master your subject matter as well as yourself.